Thursday is my BIG day.

So, I'm asking for prayers, please.  If you don't pray...how about some positive thoughts headed my way?  I'll take those, too!

So, I have RSD aka Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy.  It's a nerve disease.  Basically, I'm in pain 24/7 and I've lost/re-gained/lost again function in my left arm from my neck into my shoulder through my fingertips.  I swell up, cold air, a breeze, cool water, air conditioning, any vibration, physical touch (especially light touch) and many other things cause pain.  Truthfully, I don't like to talk about it and I really hate to complain.  I prefer to keep a positive attitude, but trust me I can be a real whiner and all-around *itch somedays. 

Overall, the past few years since I've been diagnosed have been difficult, but my family and friends (man, do you find out who your REAL friends are!!!) have been an epiphany.  I've been forced in learning patience, made to become more "laid back", and I have an incredible new spirituality that I am truly grateful for.  My appreciation for my husband and two sons is beyond words.  They are all three wonderful men that are true blessings in my life.

So, what's happening on Thursday?  I am having a trial surgery at the University.  My treatments I had been having every two weeks had quit working some months ago, and insurance finally gave me the okay to get this surgery.  I am so ready.  If When this works, we will be able to re-start our adoption process for the third time (third time's a charm, right?)!!!  When this trial surgery works, then they will go back in and implant the full thing in a much longer full surgical proceedure.  I'll ask for those prayers when that time comes :)

Note: All images in this post have been “borrowed” from the internet. If I’m using your image and you don’t want me to, let me know and I’ll take it down.

This Blogging Thing

I really have wanted to blog in ages, but you see there have been a few things holding me back:

First, and for most, ME!
Secondly, a stupid disease that I have debated whether or not to share with you about (and shamefully haven't been brave enough), plus it has held me back physically.
And thirdly, my perfectionism/self-doubt/negative self-talk (you know the kind..."I'm not as good as other Mommy bloggers").

Anyway, today's not the day for it, but I do plan on kicking my SELF, my DISEASE, and my DOUBTS in the hind-end(s?) and get back on the horse.  So, if any of you few are still with me.  I *am* still alive and kicking...just apparently not the correct body parts :)

Less than Five Months to Go!

I'm going to Disney!  Can you tell that I'm excited?  I'm going with my friend, KT.  We are just doing a "girls' week away."  Can you top that?  Okay, anyone going to pick up their new child beats that, but for the "waiters" like me, you just can't beat the promise of fun called Walt Disney World.

My lovely friend is a Dis-expert.  She's done this before.  I'm a newbie and the wait is making me feel like a little kid again.  KT (with my input) has created some delicious sounding reservations for us.  Here's what we're doing:

•Sat 5/1: 5:00 Brown Derby (inside Hollywood Studios. I managed to get the latest possible Fantasmic Dinner Package. Basically it means we will receive a ticket into the side entrance of the Fantasmic theater. Part of the seating is roped off for those with the tickets and we don't have to arrive quite as early. Seating is not assigned but if we show up 45 minutes before the show we should still be OK while those without the ticket may choose to arrive 1.5-2 hours early!) It will be a stretch time-wise with our arrival but the guy I talked to assured me if we are a little late, they will still do their best to seat us.



•Sun 5/2: 11:30 Sci-Fi Dinner Theater (inside Hollywood Studios), 5:05 Biergarten (inside Epcot)


•Mon 5/3: 12:35 Grand Floridain Cafe (at Grand Floridian Resort), 6:55 Artist Point (at Wilderness Lodge resort, I released our ADR at Whispering Canyon Cafe for this one)


•Tues 5/4: 12:00 Chefs de France (inside Epcot), 7:20 California Grill (at Contemporary Resort)


•Wed 5/5: 12:00 Teppan Edo (inside Epcot, I managed to get an earlier ADR), 8:35 Jiko (at Animal Kingdom Lodge, late but we will be able to stay at Animal Kingdom until closing at 8 then have dinner)


•Thurs 5/6: 10:20 Crystal Palace (I couldn't help this one! It's Pooh and friends character dining inside Magic Kingdom. They will have breakfast food when we arrive then transition to lunch at it approaches 11), 6:20 Ohana (at Polynesian resort)
 
Anything you think we're missing?  Ideas?  I'm so excited.  My first experience with Disney, and I don't have to be the Mom...I get to be the Kid!!!

A Direct Hit Right Between the Eyes to Start the New Year

Vacation is over and the New Year (and a new decade) has begun.  It is time to get back into a rhythm and flow, find my focus, and set some goals, but first I wanted to share this quote I read yesterday with you.  It smacked me right between the eyes.  I hope it impacts you, too.  Get ready for a power-packed punch...

"Patience to wait does not come from suffering long in what we lack, but from sitting long in what we have."

-Beth Moore, inspirational author and speaker

How did that hit you?  Still reeling from the blow?  Seeing stars?  I don't know about you, but I'm still feeling the effects.

I don't know what you are waiting on or how long and how much you've suffered, but I'm willing to guess that the wait and the suffering of it all has been your focus --- just like it has been for me.  I'm also guessing that Beth Moore didn't make that quote the theme of her entry for January 3rd in her book, Praying God's Word Day by Day, just for Beth Schlarmann but for a slew of "waiters" around the world.  Correct me if I'm wrong.

So, if you will let me indulge myself (hey, it is my blog!), I'll let you know what I "have" to sit long in:

I have been so blessed to be married for 17 years (yes, I was just a youngin!) to my best friend, confidant, lover, father of my children, and hero, Steve.  God knew what He was doing when He brought Steve and I together.  My husband has been the provider, the strength, the smarts, and the difference maker in our family.  He has carried me on his back throughout my illness and encouraged me to stay optimistic and strong. 

Then there is "Peat", my oldest son.  He was blessed with self-confidence the likes of which I never have had.  He is a leader and a listener with great big hopes and dreams for his future...a future I have no doubt he will succeed in.  And my "Peat" has the greatest belly laugh you've ever heard that comes with a clever sense of humor.  He, too, has blessed my life. 

And who could forget my "Repeat", my youngest son.  He is the most empathetic person I've ever met.  He truly has a gift of understanding and "feeling" other's emotions and moods.  Does it stop there?  Oh, no.  My "Repeat" is able to just be still in your company and bring you peace.  Talk about being gifted.  Not to mention the child is the best hugger out there.  I am blessed by this son of mine.

Then, of course, comes my family.  All of you by biology, adoption, or marriage came to me through love.  I can't wait to see who else God chooses to call my family.  We are blessed to have each other.

I have been given an enormous gift called friendship.  There are so many of you that I call friend.  You have enriched my life in so many ways.  Some of you I don't know well (or even don't know), but I hope that my circle of friendship grows to include each of you.  There are some people that I'm blessed to call both family and friend, and others of you who have taught me that friends are family.  I am sitting long in you.

I have been blessed by opportunities.  There are many that come my way through friendship, through business, through adoption, through blogging, and through faith.  I can only hope that this year, 2010, I will seize those opportunites and find many others.

Then there are the "things" in life.  I'm blessed by a roof over my head, cars to drive (that are even paid for), food to eat, and all those tangibles.  There are so many people in this world (147 million children orphaned or abandoned worldwide) who don't have those things we take for granted. 

I am also blessed by hope.  Hope for our daughter-to-be and any future children we may be blessed with, hope for a cure for RSD, hope for a long and fruitful life, and  hope for a future without poverty, war, or pain.

Most of all I am blessed by faith and love in and through our Lord above.

Hmm, I don't know about you, but today I'm going to be sitting long in all I have.

This Hurts My Mommy Heart

International adoption at 13 year low.

Please prayerfully consider adopting an orphan.

The Gift of Patience

I am learning to be patient.  No, don't laugh.  I really am.  While I may seem a bit insane hasty from time to time, I really am much more laid-back than I used to be.  I am learning.

You see when we decided to get pregnant with "Peat," I did.  Days before I found out I was pregnant with "Repeat," we decided to start trying and we were.  Even my four angels awaiting me in heaven were asked for and received (although, they weren't meant to live here on  earth).  Now, the journey to our little Ladybug Princess on the other hand has been a true trial of patience and faith.

Basically, my whole life I've been spoiled well-loved.  Don't get me wrong.  I've had to work for many things in my life, but I've always had a timeline/game plan to follow.  Doing "A" by this date netted me "B" and so on.  I have always known the date or approximately when I would achieve my goal.  With the adoption, the timing is not really up to me.  Not that anything ever is, but I used to think it was.  Up until two years ago and the whole injury debacle, I honestly thought I was the one in control of my life.  Now, I laughingly say that I gave up control back then.  Truthfully, God has been the only on in control forever and always will be.

So, I'm a work in progress.  I was given the gift of patience through a series of sufferings complications that have genuinely enabled me to be a better me.  They say, "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger."  Well, friends, I am going to be SUPERWOMAN!

Thank  you, Lord, for your gift of patience to this undeserving soul.

Do YOU know it's Christmastime?

If you haven't heard the song "Merry Christmas" by Third Day you may not understand where my heart is coming from.

We are in the process of adopting a little princess from China.  It is so difficult to not just jump on a plane and go get her, but the paperwork is not ready.  We have much to do before we bring her home.  I know that our daughter will come home to us in God's perfect timing.  I know that in my head but sometimes my heart takes awhile to catch up.  This time of year seems especially hard.  Our Ladybug Princess is in an orphanage.  We don't know if she has enough food to eat, if she is comforted when she cries, if she knows that our Lord and Savior was born on Christmas day over 2,000 years ago.  There is only one gift I want under our tree this year, and I won't get her.  It certainly makes me realize what Christmas really is all about. 
Sweet Ladybug Princess, I pray that God's angel are watching over you.


Being unwanted, unloved, uncared for, forgotten by everybody, I think that is a much greater hunger, a much greater poverty than the person who has nothing to eat.   - Mother Teresa

Note: All images in this post have been “borrowed” from the internet. If I’m using your image and you don’t want me to, let me know and I’ll take it down.